I woke up in the recovery room, groggy, confused and quiet. There was Jeremy, eyes wide, saying my name over and over. I remembered where I was and why I was there at the same time Jer placed a little bundle in my arms.
There I stared at the perfect little face and said hello to my baby son. He was so tiny. Too tiny to live. But absolutely perfect. I held him closely for the last 1/4 of his life. We took a few photos, whispered in his ear the love we had for him and told him thank you for everything. We also said, see you soon.
Elijah Burton Eagar
born May 1, 2000
weighing in at 12 oz
and was 9 and 1/2 inches tall
lived 1 precious hour
18 comments:
I am so relieved that you at least got to hold him before he left you. So unimaginably tiny. Thanks for pouring out your heart. Revisiting something painful makes it seem like you were just there so I know this was so difficult for you to do. Thanks again for letting us all be there with you.
oh, so tiny. what a blessing to be given the opportunity to whisper your love to him.
and your husband, he is so sweet and tender with you. I really like him.
I am teary looking at those sweet hand and feet prints. It is a good reminder that every precious second we have with our children is a blessing.
Oh, so tiny, and yet what a big impact this sweet little soul had on you, your family, and now so many others. Thanks for sharing this.
Eli Week is amazing. Each day I get a little more choked up, just getting a sense of the emotions you and your husband still feel. And the hands and feet...nothing I can say about those except I love them.
Thank you so much for sharing such a personal experience. I am so happy that you were able to hold him and speak sweet words of love to him. The handprints and footprints are so precious.
I think you are an amazing woman. Your faith, your love and that you shared that with us! Thank you, I hope time heals and I know he is watching over you each day!
Being pregnant and only a week less along than when your ordeal began has made Eli's story so much more real for me. Fortunately, I have been blessed with a sense of calmness to where the possibilities of what "could" happen have not, and do not worry me. While I do not envy the pain that this experience caused you, I envy that your child was so sweet, so precious, and so important, that his mortal life was brought to an end so soon so that he could join his Father's kingdom again. Thank you for taking me on this journey with you! I admire your courage, your will, and your spirit. You truely are an amazing woman Suz!!
I have always loved those little prints. They are so special. It is nice to have them to help remember that those special babies did really exist and that they had a special purpose in our lives. Please come on over any time and hold the baby. Ally
oh suzie, those hands and feet are the sweetest little things ever. he was tiny! i have to say that i admire your spirit and strength so much. i'm so grateful you've shared your story with us...
not to seem insensitive, but i tried sending an email to an address that tib gave me yesterday, for details of the party next week... i haven't heard back, so i'm wondering if it didn't get to you. email me at landslidejones@msn.com if you're still interested ;) thanks!
I know that it's not the ending that you wanted, but just think of the tender mercies of a loving Father in Heaven. I am so happy that you got to have those precious minutes with little Eli.
It will be a happy ending before you know it.
Suzie I have tears streaming down my cheeks just looking at those prints and reading your words. I can't imagine how difficult that must have been. Thank you so much for sharing it with all of us. I am so glad you were able to hold him for a few minutes.
i could not help but feel overwhelmed with emotion reading the past few posts about your precious little eli. those little hand and footprints are just so small. i can't imagine what those minutes were truly like for you, but i know they are minutes you think about on a daily basis, the precious time you were able to spend with your darling angel. again, thanks for sharing this story. prayers for you from my family to yours. this week must be so hard every year.
you have an amazing spirit. thanks.
lots of crying over this way. what a beautiful experience yet so very heartbreaking.
i'm so sorry, suzie. i hope this week has helped....
ps your comment on listening to my music made me gasp with delight last night--i can say with 100% assurance that it's my most favorite comment i've EVER received on my blog.......it means a LOT. thanks you for that
WOW! Such tiny fingers and toes...what a miracle! I'm so glad you were able to hold and love him! What a difficult, and spiritual experience...thank you so much for sharing all of this, I know your story will help others through trials they may be facing.
Oh, Suzie. He had such a small body, but such a large lasting impact on your life. Thank you so much for sharing this. It's been incredibly spiritual to read about this journey for you. You are amazing.
Such a special and hard experience to go through, I am so glad that you have shared your (and his story). He is probably smiling down on you.
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